March 7, 2012 § 8 Comments
Hoping you’re lovely and enjoying the vibrant Full Moon energyyy!
It has definitely been a volatile year and I’ve had a few things happen over the last few weeks that have made it hard for me to stay positive and focused.
Nobody said it was easy!
Even for superlovers like us *wink*
It has been good for me to have these wobbly moments because I’d rather know where the weaker spots are in my self and in my self esteem so I can address, understand and nurture them. When we have these little or big breakdowns in our life, they’re normally followed by equal or greater levels of ‘Ah haaa!’ and break through – so worth it! My goal is to make the in-between times and the breakdown times as smooth, calm and contented as possible because these moments are inevitable, natural and healthy and it’s how we deal with them, what we learn from them and where we go from there that’s important. Lots of this comes down to attitude and how we manage our emotions as they arise, here a few practical tips from me…
9 Ways To Stay In The Light…
Piece By The Incredible Sharlena Wood
1. Breathe… I cannot tell you the number of times a little fit or a little slump has been avoided by taking 6 minutes to sit on a lovely cushion and to find my breath again.
Here’s a little routine I do:
Find Your Breath: Find a comfy position to sit in. I like to sit on a cushion and for those with tight knees or hips, just add an extra cushion right under your butt for some lift! You can sit in a chair too, whateverrr, now just notice where your breath is sitting, don’t try and change anything at first. Is your inhale high in your chest? Where are you shoulders? Is your tummy involved? Close your eyes for better focus or light a candle so your eyes are entertained.
Loosen Up: Keep focus on your breath but allow and coax your body to move and wiggle in whatever way feels right. If you feel a bit stuck for where to begin, I suggest a light shake of the shoulders, a kinda Burlesque boob shimmy but keep your back tall. Maybe your body will want you to rock back and forth catatonic style or for you to scrunch your face – just listen and do and don’t judge whatever comes up. « Read the rest of this entry »
January 13, 2012 § Leave a Comment
It’s One Mega Year Already And Not Even Halfway Through January
. . .
I know I share a lot with you and I’m thankful my honesty and expression has always been received so sweetly; isn’t it fun to grow together? In 2011, I moved out from anonymity and connected my face and body to Rubyyy Jones, and it would seem 2012 will hold much more of that, but my spirit wonders, what’s next?… What more…
After sharing my thoughts and feelings on faking orgasms, on body hair, on my eating disorder and love, lust, lovvve and light (don’t forget pussy portraits!), I’ve learned how much I can share, while keeping hold of my own space. In my own space I have a different name, I dream different dreams, I am a different woman, while the same. While falling in love with myself I have found this space, falling in and out of love with lovely people has helped me refine it and making ‘mistakes’ has made it all the more clear. This is a space that I know will change over the years, through my life, and I trust myself to preserve, always, my own piece, my own peace.
I want to explore video, as muse and maker, I’ll be bringing you my voice and expanded thoughts through my new radio show: The Save Rubyyy Jones Hour (More On That Soon!). I want to make and muse some incredible images, in photos, in charcoal and in paint. I want to share, dare and bare more, and I will. I’ve been a bit nervous, in the past, to share too much of myself but now is the time to be real. I want to create more from the fabric of my skin, the canvas of my face and the technicolor of my imagination.
Here’s To Baring It All…
Love Lust & Light
January 4, 2012 § 4 Comments
Happy New Year Loversss!
We’re here, we made it and, hopefully, we’re excited or, at least, optimistic. I had an absoluuutely mental December of mostly working but also traveling, a few great performances and some intense heart and soul stuff. I know you understand but I always miss you and my blog when I’m away…
One of my December highlights was performing at the amazing sexy arty party Kinky Salon London! Run by an incredible team, it’s always an interesting night out and I had the pleasure of performing for some witty and wicked people. I did my ‘I Wannna B’ act but decided to shake things up a bit and take advantage of the venue’s full nudity license – I kept my bum charm and gave them the NYC Style full monty! I had a great time; I love my body and being naked and if people cheer at the end, it’s a delicious bonus. I had a wonderful evening, as there were so many lovely people I knew that I got to chat up with and so many new friendly people to meet – also my Dark Horse was looking very yummy on my arm. Many thanks to all involved!
So I’ve still got some more writing to do about 2011, I got a bit burnt out by…I dunno…October? It was just such a massive year and it kept going till the last minute, didn’t it!? Jeeez! But I’m gunna take this time to look ahead and just brainstorm some things I’d like to write about in 2012…
How To Get Over A Lover Break Up
How To Get Over A Friendship Break Up
My Feminist Manifesto
The Tantra Of Rubyyy Jones
Butt Love: The Freedom Of Anal Sex
Finding Your Glamour
The Crown Of Love
I Hate The Word ‘Chubby’
I Hate The Term ‘Vanilla’
10 Ways To Stay In The Light
Cultivating A Healthy Fantasy Life
Pleasure Portals Workshop Review
My Safe Sex Guide
What Is Energy?
Manifesting And You
Why Three ‘Ys’ Rubyyy Jones?
My Guide To Being A Showgirl
I Get Pussy Plastered
10 Things To Do In London
Save Rubyyy Jones Update
The Girl Who Broke My Heart
Sensual Vs Sexual
Sex At All Ages!
Introduction To The Chakras!
MORE Sex Superheroes!
MORE Burlesque Show Gossip!
MORE Book Reviews!
. . .
BRING IT ON 2012
Love Lust & Light
December 14, 2011 § 1 Comment
Yeahhh I realize I’ve been a bit quiet lately, a bit distant you might say; I have been giving my personal life a little breathing space and also have been a busy bee!
I’m back to you now, a little tentatively as I see my blog changing shape in the new year, and I find myself in a interesting head and heart space. I realized, while on a brief holiday in Canada, that I’m in love with two wonderful men. This is lovely for lots of reasons and I feel lucky to be blessed with very lovable lovers. Jackson is a darling and my darling, also known as Dark Horse, and he is just that and is alwayyys ‘dark horsing’ me. I’ve never been in such sweet love before and it really is a joy to be adored by him. This time last week, I was soaking in a lavender bubble bath he had drawn for me, scrubbing off that nights show and treating my tired everything. I could feel him through the wall, both of us so happy to be together again after a break and loving the physical closeness of our connection, I was smiling to myself and felt more at ease than I have in ages and I was struck so strongly by the thought:
…Love Really Is All You Need…
One of the things I ’ve loved learning from, with Jackson is the pleasure and freedom of nonattachment and though I like nice things, enjoy comfort and a tactile life, as I sat scrubbing away it really sunk in for me that I would rather this feeling of connected tenderness and to live a modest life then to have any and all of my wildest material dreams fulfilled. This is happiness in your bones that comes simply from loving someone and being loved in return.
After toweling off and a few hours of ridiculously lovely sex with my love, I had a little cry on his shoulder as I told him that I realised, while on my brief Canadian holiday, that my heart is in a polyamorous place at the moment (I’m all about fluidity so I will not declare a fixed orientation) and I was happy to find that I love Jackson and am in love with him but that I also love and am in love with Flynt. Jackson is polyamorous, so the tears were not in the telling but I felt the heaviness of speaking through years of conditioning and also not feeling very sure about what to do about it all. Flynt and I are not together and may never be the position where an ‘us’ would be possible – all I really could do is tell him. And I did.
I wish I could say telling him lifted the weight I feel or made my heart lighter but it honestly didn’t really. Well maybe a bit…but to me it’s information that needed to be shared for fairness sake, fairness to me, to him and to my heart. I don’t love people so they will love me back, I love because it is my nature and my passion and knowing whether he feels deeper love for me or not is not my motivation for telling. To be honest, I’m not even asking for a particular future with him cause I just don’t have that on my mind, I don’t know what I want from this situation…maybe just to be loved…
When I first got together Flynt I had this little dream for our love. While I was in England, we would be lovers and make the most of the time we had and of each other, we would fall in love so we could love each other the rest of this life. I would see him when I came back to London, for work or holiday and I would spend a few weeks in the quiet country each year, with him and his family, relaxing, writing and revisiting our connection. Our love would change and grow, would see him settled in his life,surrounded by family, happy at last, would see me through soulmates and children and art. We would grow old and I’d probably know the emptiness of living on this earth without him rolling around, causing mischief and I would hold, close to my spirit, the energy of everything that we were to each other. Just a little dream…
I’m back and I’m sharing and I thank you for being so patient
Love Lust & Light
November 18, 2011 § Leave a Comment
It’s That Time Again!
Big Thanks To The Looovely Sarah Berry Who Invited Me Along To Private Pictures
My Entry On The Evening (Private Picturesss), Below!
Welcome to e[lust] - Your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in e[lust] #32 ? Start with the rules, come back in January to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!
~ This Week’s Top Three Posts ~
A Feminist Defense of Consensual Nonconsent – How does a woman who identifies as a feminist reconcile her desire to submit to her partner during sex? Being somewhat new to kink, I had some trepidations about how submission seemingly went against my ethics.
Intimates – As the evening drew on, I felt like the sexiest woman alive. It’s strange to describe it this way, but I actually felt brimming with a sort of sexual energy. A lustiness, a sexiness, an allure and a desire all at once.
Tightest Space – I’m paying close attention to your moans, and I stop whenever it feels like it might be too much. But the incredibly tight feeling of your ass gripping my cock is so delicious that I need to get all the way in.
~ e[lust] Editress ~
An Open Letter to the Sex Toy Industry – I write this post not to just let off some steam but with the smallest glimmer of hope that maybe…….just maybe….some of these words will land on the right computer screen and be taken to heart. Maybe one change will happen.
~ Featured Post (Lilly’s Pick) ~
International #Fisting Day!! – Beyond awareness and calling for action, I think International Fisting Day is a great day to celebrate fisting; an intimate, hugely erotic and often orgasmic act that doesn’t get the recognition it deserves.
Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships
A Bit about Crushes
Are You on the Pill?
How to Approach Your Partner with a Fantasy
Meeting New People
Sex And Disability: What Does the Literature Say?
Settling – Striving For Connections in Non-Monogamy
Sex and Heart Attacks
Training my rear end
Sex News, Interviews, Politics & Humor
Kink & Fetish
Love Lust & Light
November 15, 2011 § 16 Comments
Sooo a couple months ago, as a birthday gift to start and then as an experiment, I began to grow out my body hair. In the past I’ve done the shaving thing and the waxing thing and it wasn’t until I began growing my hair that I realized…
I didn’t even know what my preference was, how I wanted to be…
I shaved because, like most girls who learn from mother, media and men, I believed I should have smooth legs, underarms and follow fashion for the pubes. I was more of a shaver, as waxing is pricey and left my sensitive skin bruised around my thighs and mound, though I preferred my underarms waxed. Legs, I was never picky with them, I did love the slip of a smooth hair-free calf and boys did too. Underarms were obviously, always shaved, beautiful women did not have furry armpits and that was total dirty hippie territory.
It has been 2ish months and it’s been wonderful experimenting and discovering how I feel about my body and body hair. I let my legs grow, because I have fair hair and love the different kind of softness when I touch my skin. My pubes I’m still undecided about, as it’s a mix of loving them natural and, as I do more burlesque and am applying more merkins, tape and/or glue, hating them! As you can imagine!
As you know, I’m a bit showgirl meets s***disturber and I love the ultra feminine blend of sequin dresses, glittering jewels and a full armpit of hair. I enjoy the effect it has on people and how and what it makes them think; about glamour, about feminism, about their tastes. I genuinely love the way it looks and feels.
I am happy that I took the time to experiment, to discover what I like, that I have the freedom in myself to do so. What I like most about this little journey is, that now I feel liberated from a single way of being I know I can always change my style and I’ll be doing it for me. It was nice to break my attachments to certain standards of beauty, femininity and perception by others so I can be one step closer to a totally free me!
Would love to know your thoughts! Leave me a comment about your fur rituals!
Love Lust & Light
November 9, 2011 § 2 Comments
I’m Not Interested
In Sleazy Love
I Want It Deep
Bright In The Sky
I’ll Take All Your Baggage
Move Your Luggage Up The Stairs
Sandbags Of Sadness, All Your Cares
Nothing Too Heavy
Tumble Out Of Mouths
Sprinkle Over Eggs
On My Pillows
Under My Skin
Of Our Easy
After Months Of Cold Love
Of Almost Love
Of Sad Love
Give Me Your
Thanks For Your
I Love Your
Click The Pic For All The #Move Entries
And For All The Wanton Ones, Thanks To Molly For Taking It On This Week! xxx
Love Lust & Light
November 8, 2011 § 16 Comments
Hoping you are reading this feeling grounded, feeling joyful, feeling thankful!
I am feeling, as I write this, a bit nervous and grateful, to be sharing a chapter of my life with you; in a way I feel that this is a story that is still being written, that may remain a footnote for the rest of my life. When we suffer with, from and for a dis-ease that shows up on our skin, manifests in a cough or scratchy throat, it’s hard to hide our afflictions, and maybe we don’t want to – cuddles are the best cure for the common cold! When we suffer from mental illness, it’s our secret dis-ease for a while, or forever, and becomes a dear companion, the only one who understands; this is my tale of bulimia and me.
I began sticking my fingers down my throat late in my teens but my body war began long before. We moved from the quiet town where I grew up to a big city, right at the time when my parent’s dysfunctional marriage really hit its peak; I was nine and I began to turn to food for comfort. The move was very hard for me and I was bullied at my new school, kids called me a ‘rich bitch’ (we lived in a big house, we were not poor but we were not rich) and I was mocked relentlessly for my strange eyes, often wordlessly across the room I’d see them pulling at the corners of their faces to mimic my almond slant. I stopped speaking up in class, I didn’t join any clubs and I didn’t have many friends; I’d spend most of my time alone after school or dance class, listening to and watching musicals, dreaming of when I would grow up and be the beautiful movie star I wanted to be. I wasn’t totally unhappy in my singing and dancing world but I was lonely sometimes and self-doubt began to build a little fort inside my mind.
Almost every morning while my Dad was in the shower, I would sneak into his room, slip my hand into yesterday’s trousers and steal some money for my ritual. It began to be my favorite part of the day when I could have a sweet reassuring binge before heading into the hostile, scary place that was school. I found salvation in all the foods my Mom would never buy, in the puckering sour of penny candies, in the creamy filling of pastries and the oily comfort of potato chips. Soon my average frame met puberty, and these daily caloric overloads, and my little body ballooned so they could add ‘fat bitch’ to their arsenal of insults. After two years of almost constant tumult we moved back to our same small town and my eating disorder moved with us, I was eleven.
As a girl and a preteen I was precocious, clever, beautiful, creative, I could sing, dance, play sports, write essays, do math, you name it, but with the help of my new friend I realized there was one thing I would never be: thin. I loved spending my allowance or babysitting cash on People, Vogue and Vanity Fair magazine, I was into everything Hollywood, old and new and I wanted nothing more than to one day be in the pages of those zines. I covered one door in my bedroom with those milk ads, so many perfect glossy bodies and faces, all milk mustachioed, smiling at me as I stared into a full-length mirror loathing myself. My tummy was always what I hated the most and I punished myself as I saw fit, grabbing handfuls of flesh I would squeeze and twist myself until I broke down, sometimes punching myself as hard as I could in the stomach, never as hard as I wanted to; I know now I wanted to feel pain physically to match the pain I felt so intensely in my heart. It was at this time that my parents got divorced and my first round of depression really set in. So as I was adjusting to my changing body, high school, parents divorce, I was making more space in my self for my depression, my eating disorder and thoughts of suicide, I was thirteen, fourteen. It was a hard time for Rubyyy Jones. « Read the rest of this entry »
October 27, 2011 § Leave a Comment
Sooo Many Things To Looove
Right Now For Me, It’s All About The Hands Dahling!
There Are Lots Of Ways We Can Bring Attention To Our Lovely Appendages And Their Many Parts: Rings, Nail Polish/Art, Tattoos..
A Few Weeks Ago I Attended The Opening Of A Little Lingerie Shop, Which Is Always Fun And I Was Happy To Sit Down With The Lovely Madam Of Boom Nails, Custom Cute Nail Art… Here’s What I Got Done
Bit Glare-y / Soryyy… But Yesss, Of Courrrse
I Got Hearts!
Black On My Fingers, Silver On My Thumbs
You Can Find Out More About Her Here
And That’s My New Favorite Ring!
Here In Grey…
Pampering My Nails & Showing Off My Fingers (Which I Used To Hate!) Has Been Really Fun For Me Lately And Helps Me Feel Special And Glamorous With The Littlest Touch. I Know That Ring’s Not So Little But, It Only Takes A Second To Put On And It Makes A Big Statement.
This Is A Leopard Print Nail Tutorial From Cute Polish On YouTube, She Has Some Ammmazing Design Videos And Also Great Tip Vids, Like How To Make Your Own Specialty Painting Tools Which Is Helpful For Those More Intricate Designs…
Hands Are One Of Our Strongest Energy Points And Working Gently With Our Hands We Can Access A Lot Of Power And Healing, For Ourselves And Others. I Love This Little Flip Book Mudra Vid And Here’s The Wiki Mudra Entry If You Want To Learn A Little More..
I Looove Rings And Recently Picked Up This Gem At My Local Charity Shop…
These Are The Three Rings I’m Lusting After At The Moment…
Butler And Wilson – Entwined Hearts
The Great Frog – Gold Leopard Print Ring W Citrine
Topshop – Love Word Ring
Love Lust & Light
October 25, 2011 § Leave a Comment
Gosh, What A Difference A Year Makes…
It Was My Birthday Yesterday, I Turned Seventy Seven
I Quite Like Getting Older
Looking Forward To My Thirties
Although I Feel Like My Life Has ‘Begun’
Something Tells Me That Time Will Be Mentalll
And I Know Everything In Between Will B Wild And Wonderful Too…
So Thinking Back On Where I Was A Year Ago
Rubyyy Jones Had Juuust Been Born
(Oh, Happy Anniversary Darling)
But The Birth Was Simply In The Word
Tho We Had Made Our Burlesque Debut
It’s Taken Most Of This Year For Me To Really Understand
What I’m Doing With The Burlesque
What I Want To Say As An Artist And Educator
So, Most Of Rubyyy Lived On This Blog
Almost In Love With Samurai, Attached A Bit Too Heavily
Still Seeing BBB, Wondering About That Attachment
Big Shifts Happening Within My Friend Relationships
Huge Energetic Gaps After I Let Go Of Some Deep Attachments To Ego, Conditioning and Negativity, Leaving Me Wobbly Spiritually
Learning To Face The World With A Vibrant Vulnerability, Connected To The Natural Flow Of Things
Coming Out Of The Dark Of A Very Depressed Twenty-Sixth Year
I Was Only Finding My Feet
Today I Am So Very Proud Of Myself
To This Day I Love, And Am Loved In Return, By My Various Lovers Of The Year
I Cherishhh The Sweetest I Keep W ‘Former’ Lovers…
( Do You Ever Stop Being Lovers In Your Connection?… )
I Am Working Hard To Save Rubyyy Jones
And Though I Think I Could Work Harder Sometimes
I’ve Learned The Wisdom Of Gentleness And I Know I Am Always Doing My Best
My Orgasms Have Changed
My Hair Has Changed, Several Times…
My Dreams For Rubyyy Jones
For Peaceful Inner Enlightenment, Remain A Constant
I Continue To Build And Seek My Chosen Family
And I Feel Lucky To Include Lots Of The Special People From My Biological Family In This Growing Tribe
I Feel The Pure Bravery Returning To My Day To Day
Gearing Up To 2012 And 2014
Certain Dates I Have In Mind
The Return To My Fearless Teenage Self Is Most Exciting, When I Feel The Balance Of My More Experienced, Thoughtful Self Bringing Me Always Into Grace With My Actions
Grace, Graceful, Grateful
I Wish To Embody These Three States Of Being
It Feels Wonderful To Be Awake Again
To Fuck And Make Love To/With People Who Are Awake
To Collaborate, Create And Boost People Who Are Awake
To Know The Possibilities Of An Awake World
I Have So Many People, Situations & Opportunities To Be Thankful For
I’m Looking Forward To Seeing What This Year Brings
I’m Looking Forward To Being Thankful This Time Next Year
I’m Looking Forward
Power In The Reprise…
. . .